Features
The Single Life in Oklahoma
The ups, downs and inspirations from those living single in the city.
From a college student to a single mom, looking for a date or enjoying flying solo, four singles open up and share their opinions about the single life in Oklahoma.
The Attorney
Susan Beaty, an attorney in Oklahoma City, enjoys her full and active life as a single. Whether taking part in the visual arts community, reading for her book club or traveling with friends, Beaty takes advantage of her free time by pursuing interests.
While she says that Oklahoma City may not be the city best suited for singles, Beaty says there are many places to find, or take, that special date.
“I know people who have met playing on adult, co-ed soccer teams, rowing on the Oklahoma River and bicycling or sailing at Lake Hefner,” Beaty says.
Other options in and around Oklahoma City include wine and beer tastings, food events, concerts and Thursday nights on the Oklahoma City Museum of Art rooftop.
The challenges for Beaty come down to meeting those single men that have common interests, as well as finding a date to take to events.
“My perception is that people in this part of the country get married younger, so there are fewer well-educated, professional singles around who are over 30.”
Beaty encourages other singles to get out and have fun.
“If you are doing things that interest you, you’re more likely to meet someone with those same interests, but more importantly you’ll be having fun along the way.”
The Student
Geoff Rottmayer, a construction management college student, has decided the time has come for the single chapter in his life to close.
Living in midtown Tulsa, Rottmayer enjoys golfing, fishing, reading and spending time with family and friends, yet his search for that perfect girl to share his life with continues.
“I like the single life, but I’m ready to move on, get married and start a family,” Rottmayer says.
As a student in Tulsa, Rottmayer says that the city is a great place to be single.
“It’s big without being too big, and it is cosmopolitan enough to offer a lot of things to do,” Rottmayer says. “If Tulsa had an ocean, it would be perfect.”
While the freedom and time with friends is a nice perk to being single, Rottmayer simply wants to find the right girl for him. His advice for other singles out there: Simply enjoy it.
The Single Mom
Lydia Bracken, a full-time mom, executive assistant and graduate student, lives the single life amidst all of her responsibilities in Tulsa.
“I don’t really feel like I’m living ‘the single life;’ it’s more like I live ‘the family life’ and occasionally act single,” Bracken says.
Whether she is in class or cheering on her children at a ball game, Bracken makes time for herself with either a night out with friends or simply doing something she really enjoys.
“I won’t just date to date,” Bracken says. “I’d rather spend my time with friends doing something I know I’ll enjoy. I also like having the freedom to pursue things I’m interested in without having to consult or compromise with anyone.”
While the single life has its advantages, the challenges are evident.
“The biggest challenge for me has been no longer having someone to share the responsibilities with,” Bracken says. “And I miss having someone to curl up with at the end of the day.”
Bracken advises others not to settle for a relationship simply to have a relationship.
“Never settle for anything less than you deserve,” she insists. “Enjoy your life and believe that what is supposed to be will be.”
The Young Professional
Tulsa attorney Vaughn Iskanian enjoys the freedom and flexibility of the single life, as well as the opportunities it allows him.
“I appreciate that I can do whatever I want, whenever I want,” Iskanian says. “You have more time to expand your horizons.”
Iskanian uses his time to travel, participate in charity functions and support causes that he otherwise might not have time to invest in.
“I also find myself watching more sports,” he notes.
These activities and events provide the perfect place to meet compatible people with similar interests, though after living in other cities such as Washington D.C., Iskanian says Tulsa does not seem as geared toward the single crowd.
Plus, working in the professional arena sometimes leaves little room for interacting with singles his own age.
While Iskanian is fairly content living the single life, companionship is a desire everyone faces at some point.
“We are all human beings, and it’s sometimes just more fun to share moments and experiences with someone else.”
Iskanian insists, however, that being single is not a bad thing.
“I don’t feel any rush to settle down,” he says. “Enjoy the experience of being single.”
State of the Date
We surveyed Oklahoma singles to find out how they really view dating.Where is your favorite place to meet singles?
24% Bar/Club
19% Through Friends
19% Parties
12% Coffee shops/bookstore/
grocery store
10% Events, concerts,etc.
9% Clubs/Organizations
7% Online
What is the biggest turn-off on a date?
20% Poor hygiene
13% Undeducated
17% Boring/Bad conversation
6% Cheap
14% Rude
20% Arrogant
10% Shy/no confidence
Do you kiss on a first date?
90% Yes
10% No
What is the best website for meeting potential dates?
45% Match.com
18% Plentyoffish.com
18% Gay.com
9% Eharmony.com
6% Okcupid.com
3% Jdate.com
What is your most effective
pick up line?
“Hello…is it me you’re looking for?”
“No line, just a simple introduction.”
“How do you know everyone here?”
What is the worst pick up line you’ve ever been given?
“Would you like to meet my nine cats?”
“I’m going home with somebody tonight.You’ll do.”
“Do you like my sweater? I knitted it myself.”
“Are you a doctor, lawyer or something?”
Describe your worst blind date.
“I drove 150 miles to meet her, and by the end of the date were fleeing Oklahoma to evade police.”
“He lied to me about everything. I had no clue he was married until his wife showed up.”
“I met her at a bookstore and she had bridal magazines stacked on the table.”
“I met her, along with her disapproving sister, at a chain restaurant. I drank margaritas while they drank water. It was also my favorite blind date.”
What is the best way to
get out of a bad date?
31% Be honest that it isn’t working
27% Create an emergency/phone call
21% Other
14% Feign illness
7% Suffer through it
How do you decide if you want to go on a second date?
“Unless it’s a complete disaster, I’ll give it a second try.”
“If they pay.”
“Generally I know within two minutes. I’ll call it instinct.”
“If I’m still smiling the next day.”
What is a dealbreaker for you?
“Dogs under 10 pounds and people that think Melanie Griffith is a talented actress.”
“No car, no job and still lives at home.”
“Someone that lies.”
“If a cell phone or inanimate object takes priority over more important things.”
How many dates do you go on before you will consider having sex with that person?
15% 0-1
36% 2-3
21% 4-6
28% More than 6
Would you date someone
just for their money?
87% No
13% Yes
Would you date an ex again?
65% Yes
35% No
Have you ever cheated
on a partner?
60% No
40% Yes
Everybody eventually settles.
63% False
37% True
